i'm scared :-( i feel so lost..it's so weird. there was a time when i was so excited about the uncertainty. but now, i am just so nervous..potentially paralyzed even. or maybe numb. like a robot just reacting to what's thrown at him or what he's faced with.

sometimes, i don't really know who i am anymore. have i lost the real me? or is the me right now the real me?

a friend is arranging something for mid-june. it somewhat scares me..and i think partly because it's something that could be good.. :-(